I am on my way to live in China. As always, for me, leaving a place is a mad rush of things to do. Usually, as is the case now, about 90% of those things should have been done already (or at least could have). Starting this blog is one of those things. I have been thinking about this for a while. As with many things, though, unless something feels real to me I have very little motivation. My visa is on the way and the plane ticket has been bought. Now it feels real.
That means the rush of packing. Realizing I've packed too much. Repacking. Giving stuff away. Getting rid of other stuff. Saying good-bye...again, but this time for real. Cleaning. Finding something I forgot I needed to pack. Choosing between what I really need to take with me, what I want to take with me, and what will be left behind. Getting things done on my list of items that should be handled before leaving, with its many additions as I think of something else. Continually checking email, Facebook (which I won't be able to soon), rechecking them despite the fact that there are a ton of things to. Wondering how I could have acquired so many things, wondering how I will start a new life without them. Things not thought of previously interrupting whatever I happen to be doing, as those things need to be done during business hours. Staring at my room, wondering how I will get it all done in time. Thinking over and over that whatever I happen to be doing could have been done before. Feeling excited, trying to hold on to that feeling as the apartment that has been my home for 3 years becomes more empty and its comforts disappear.
Going to a new place to live is frustrating as I will have to buy all those simple things like pans and sheets all over again. It is hectic, partly my fault (read above) and partly my situation, which I will be writing about later. There are extra expenses, extra inconveniences, and a destruction of any sort of comfort zone and certainty that I will know what I am doing each day.
With all of those things will come the excitement of being in a new place. I will get to experience the joys, and disappointments, of new foods. I will make new friends, see new things, and learn about a new culture. I will have photos and stories to share. These are the things that make this lifestyle worth living.
